


Ain’t That a Kick in the Head

by LexLemon



Category: Once Upon A Time In Hollywood (2019)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cliff Booth has a heart, Coming Out, Everyone needs to get on Cliff’s hype man level, Hurt/Comfort, I rated it T since it’s a heavy subject matter, M/M, NOT THE F WORD THOUGH, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period-Typical Language, Pre-Canon, Rick has an episode, difficult conversations, undiagnosed bipolar disorder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:54:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25793977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexLemon/pseuds/LexLemon
Summary: Cliff finds out Rick’s biggest secret. Little does he know that it’s a lot similar to his own...
Relationships: Cliff Booth/Rick Dalton
Comments: 4
Kudos: 38





	Ain’t That a Kick in the Head

**Author's Note:**

> I’d like to thank the Netflix series Hollywood for the term “sexually ambidextrous,” which is my favorite term ever.

_”How lucky can one guy be?_

_I kissed her, and she kissed me._

_Like the fella once said,_

_’Ain’t that a kick in the head?’”_

Cliff Booth couldn't help but walk in time with the lively tempo of the Dean Martin song playing from a crew member's radio. There was a certain bounce to his feet as they moved through the patches of dirt on Spahn Ranch. The song simply elevated the good mood he was already in.

Cliff wasn't entirely sure what it was that had made him so goddamn happy in the first place. Maybe it was the sun shining down on him that hovered in the corner of a perfectly blue sky. Maybe it was the fight scene he had filmed that day where the director said he had done so well that they only needed the one take. Maybe it was the pride he had for himself at the fact that he was almost done filming his first season as a full-time stuntman for a prime-time TV show. There hadn't been any trouble, he'd found a new best friend in his screen partner, and he had a lot more money than he had at the beginning of the year.

Cliff wasn't sure if one of these reasons or all of them put together were helping his sudden good mood. Either way, he loved it. And he was going to keep that mood going by rewarding himself with a hearty lunch onset.

Yup. Dean Martin really couldn't have said it better.

_“My head keeps spinnin’._

_I go to sleep and keep grinnin’._

_If this is just the beginnin’,_

_My life is gonna be-“_

The sound of something shattering in the distance brought Cliff to a standstill, his eyes widening at the sound. His happy mood disappeared in an instant and was replaced by pure fear with just a hint of dread.

Pressing his lips together, he turned to the side to see if the damage done called for his handiwork to fix it. Cliff found himself standing before the trailer of _Bounty_ _Law's_ lead actor and his screen partner, Rick Dalton. The shattering had definitely come from inside, and it was followed by Rick's voice yelling, "GOD, fucking dammit!"

Cliff closed his eyes and let out a slow sigh. Yup. This called for his assistance.

Rolling his shoulders back, Cliff walked over to the trailer and knocked on the door. He pressed his ear to it and said, "Rick? I-It's me."

A long silence followed his call, making Cliff almost ready to knock again. Before he could, he thought he heard a quiet sniffling come from within.

Rick's voice was so quiet, he almost didn't hear him say, "Come on in, Cliff."

Cliff nodded to himself then opened the door, slowly bringing himself inside. A small ceramic bowl lay in pieces on the floor along with cigarette butts and other oddities Rick liked to keep in his trailer. The man himself was sitting on the end of a couch towards the back, quickly rubbing at his eyes to make them look as normal as possible. Cliff wasn't an idiot, though. He could see how red-rimmed and misty they were, so the situation was definitely severe.

Cliff weaved his way past the various items on the floor so he could sit himself next to Rick on the couch.

Rick asked, "I-I-I didn't cause a scene out there, did I?"

"No, I don't think so. I think it was just me that heard you."

Rick pressed his hands to his forehead, looking down as he sighed. "Alright."

Cliff folded his hands in his lap, keeping his eyes on Rick. "You, uh...want to talk about it?"

Rick lowered one hand but curled the other into a fist, squeezing his eyes shut. He tried his best to keep his tears inside as he shook his head, but a choked up sob managed to escape.

Cliff tilted his lips to the side as he shrugged his shoulders. "Well, I'm not leaving until we can get to the bottom of this. What, is this about the saloon scene from earlier? Because the director did say shooting another take was fine, Rick. It was only one line you messed up. They can fix that."

"It ain't 'bout the fuckin' take. I'm over that."

Cliff raised an eyebrow at his friend. "Are you?"

Rick turned to him with a glare. " _Yes_. I am. Do you not fuckin' believe me when I tell you I'm over somethin'?"

"No, I-I do, I do. I just want to figure out what happened that's got you so upset."

"Fuckin' Chip Dalehart happened, that's what!" Rick let out a deep sigh as he looked away, the tears pooling out of him.

Cliff asked, "The guest star?"

Rick sniffled. "Yeah."

Cliff scooted a little closer to Rick, trying to ignore his fear of what could be said next. "Well, what did he do?"

Rick shook his head. "He didn't do nothin'. It was me. I'm the one that started this bullshit. It's always my fault."

"Hey, come on." Cliff was used to Rick's bellyaching by now, but that didn't mean he would allow him to do it and keep thinking it was true. "It is not always your fault."

"Yeah, but it was this time! I..." Rick closed his eyes and let out a wavered deep breath. "I thought Chip looked...real nice when he first came on set this week. I couldn't take my eyes off him. And he had this...this way 'bout him when he was chattin' with the rest of the crew. I don't know how to describe it.

“I could see how everyone thought he might be a...a little much, but I didn't mind it. I kind of liked it, actually. And yesterday, I-I went home and I thought maybe...maybe he was like me."

Rick paused to nod to himself, closing his eyes once more. Cliff could tell from the way he was scrunching up his face that he was mentally beating himself up for whatever he was going to say next.

"So after we filmed our scene today, I thought I'd...try to find out, you know? We were talkin' and I...I came in a-a little close and he just...fuckin' shoved me off. He yelled at me, said some...some harsh words. I guess I deserved them, though, so...there's my answer."

A bitter chuckle left Rick's mouth. "And then, I saw him later and he was just lookin' at me like I was the fuckin' devil himself."

Rick couldn't hold himself together any longer. His sobs began again as he flopped onto the arm of the couch, and he struggled to say, "God, he's goin' to fuckin' tell everyone now. I'm through, Cliff. I'm fuckin' through."

Cliff felt himself grow numb the longer he listened to Rick, his heart twisting into a knot of pain, anger, and even a little bit of empathy. He knew what Rick was talking about. He knew exactly what it fucking was. Anyone who didn't clearly wasn't listening. But Cliff still had to ask. He had to know for sure.

"Rick...are you a homo?"

Rick jolted up and stared at Cliff, his eyes filled with the pain of someone who had just been slapped in the face. God, he had never wanted this to get out. He never wanted the one person he cared about to find out. And yet, here it was. The truth delivered to him on a fucking silver platter. All he could do now was wait for Cliff to walk out that trailer door and ask for his resignation from the show. It was bound to happen. And there was no one to blame but himself.

Much to his surprise, Rick found that Cliff never left. He stayed seated on the couch, staring at him with those eyes that could cheer him up in seconds. And he kept talking.

"Rick, i-it's okay if you are-"

"No, it fuckin' ain't. Everyone knows that."

"It _is_ okay. Do you know why?" Cliff tucked in his lips for a moment. "Because I am too."

Rick threw his head back with a groan. "D-Do-Don't pull that shit with me, Cliff."

"But it's true."

"No, it ain't. You had a wife."

Cliff shrugged. "Yeah, I did. But before Billie..."

Rick furrowed his brows at his friend. He sat up straighter on the couch, his interest piqued.

A smile began to appear on Cliff's face as he leaned back. "You learn a lot about yourself when you join the military, I tell you what. One of the guys in my regiment called it being 'sexually ambidextrous.'"

Rick let out a small chuckle at that, running his hand through his hair.

"Yeah, that's what I thought too when he first said it. Sure, I enjoy a girl every now and then, but those times I had with the guys felt just as good. They were pretty great, actually. It feels just as right. And that's what they taught me too.

”There's nothing wrong with being who you are even if most people don't think like that. Once you find the right person to show you that and make you feel so goddamn perfect, you know it for good. And you'll never feel that shame again.

”So Rick Dalton, I say if you're a homo, you be a fucking homo. Because no one can take that away from you."

Rick wanted to cry again so badly, but nothing could will him to do it. He'd needed to hear those words for the longest time, and the fact that it came from someone like him made them all the more meaningful. He could hear the sincerity in Cliff's voice as he said it too, making them even more honest.

As everything softened up within him, Rick allowed himself to smile for the first time that afternoon. He whispered, "Thank you."

A sudden rapping on the trailer door pulled the two apart from each other, Rick being quick to wipe his face.

"Five minutes, Mr. Dalton!" a voice said from outside.

"I-I'll be right there!"

Cliff pat his hand on a cushion then stood up, making his way to the door. "Well, I should probably let you get ready for your scene. Hey, if Chip's still on set, do you want me to talk to him for you?"

Rick chuckled to himself, knowing exactly what kind of "talk" Cliff was referring to him. "Nah, it's fine. I don't think he'll say nothin'."

"Alright. But if he does, you know who to call."

"Thanks, Cliff."

"Hey."

Rick looked up to see Cliff smiling at him from the door, his hand raised for a salute.

"You'll be just fine, partner."

Rick nodded with a small smile and watched as Cliff left the trailer, shutting the door behind him. He sat on the couch for a moment, leaning back to let his mind wander in bliss.

Cliff had said he'd find the right person one day, but he knew deep down in his soul that he had already found him.

**Author's Note:**

> Songs referenced:
> 
> “Ain’t That a Kick in the Head”-Dean Martin: https://youtu.be/K7jgZTDLeIs


End file.
